21 Jun Anonymous Messages
I constantly see advice for post-grads who are having a difficult time finding work or achieving their dreams, or just telling people to “just go for it.” What about those of us who just have NO IDEA what we want to do with our lives? I’m 25 and I feel like I have no talents or hobbies (I just love reading and listening to music and watching movies… nothing that can be “applied”), and I think I could have the drive to “go for it” if I only knew what “it” was. Where is the advice for a person like me who absolutely can’t figure out what I want to do with my life, what the next step is, how to find a meaningful career that helps people and also makes me feel challenged and fulfilled? I’ve gone to school, I studied something I care about, but I don’t know how to apply it to the “real world”. Working full-time at a “job” that isn’t my career is driving me into depression. I feel so alone. Everyone I know that also doesn’t know what they want to do at least have amazing talents (artists, musicians, etc.) and experience (working with youth, etc.) that they can apply to more meaningful jobs. I feel so stuck. I feel so alone.
Well one thing I can tell you is that you are not alone. Believe it or not, many post-grads are in the exact same position as you… but none of them are stuck, and neither are you. I think the first thing you have to do is get out of the mind set that the things you love aren’t talents. If you love watching movies, listening to music and reading books who’s to say that you can’t apply that in the “real world”? You mentioned you love reading, so you must be a decent writer, maybe you could look into ways you can write about your favourite books, movies, and music? It may just start as a blog but you could try submitting reviews to newspapers… It may be slow work and you may not make as much initially, but it’s work you’d enjoy doing. Who knows if this is “it”, the thing you want to pursue, but the good thing is you’re gonna have a lot of things you’re gonna go for, and as long as you’re happy everything will be okay, because everything you realize isn’t your “passion” leaves you one step closer to finding your dream job. Keep your head up girl xo
My friend self-harms and she recently JUST got out of a psychiatric ward , and she tweets really depressing things, Its kind of awkward because i really don’t know what to do around her… any word of advice to help me empower my friend?
I see what you mean, situations like these are tough on both the victim and the people that they love. You say you don’t really know what to do around her, but why should your behavior change? It’s likely a lot of people are treating her differently now, focusing more on her self harming tendencies than her as a person. A person is not defined by there disorders, diseases or tendencies. So do the things you guys used to do together before she went to the psychiatric ward, if she opens up to you about self-harming listen and be supportive. That being said, if she starts saying things that may lead you to believe she is suicidal you have to tell someone. I know as a teen, we feel as if telling someone would be betraying your friend but in reality you could be saving her life. (If you want more info, here’s a great site about having a loved one who self harms )